a big transition in my family
Hi friends!! So this week I want to open the curtain again to let you see a glimpse of what's happening in my family.
Lots of things actually, but that would take too long.
A little background info for you:
I have 6 children and we home schooled for a long time. Two have graduated, one is almost done, one is in high school and two in middle school. We started public school for 3 of them 4 and half years ago. So my high school daughter who is in 11th grade, chose really difficult classes at the beginning of the school year. She is in the IB program. This was of her own choosing. At the beginning of the year I asked her if she can handle all of the added hours of study. She had already given up her part time job in the summer. She was confident that she could.
Recently though, the added stress got to her and she was physically ill. To the point where I had to go and pick her up from school several times. We all know that feeling, when stress manifests in our body and it literally hurts. We talked and she asked if she could just drop out , do on line classes and forget about the semester that she was in completely. She was willing to start her junior year all over again. So we are at a crossroad.
The compass that guides me in these situations is always:
"What is the best in this situation to ensure my child's emotional health?"
She knew I would support her in her decision to finish her high school in a different way.
The question that remained was how.
We met with her guidance counselor, whom I met alone first, and whom I assured that we are on the same team and we want what is best for her. She was awesome. First she said :"OK. Let me put my counselor hat on AND my mom hat. What would I want for my daughter ?"
I loved her right away. Later we called my daughter in to the meeting and the guidance counselor presented a few different options. One really stood out to my daughter. I encouraged her to not make a decision right away but to think about it and wait.
Later that day , when I picked her up, we talked and she was clear on her first steps that needed to be taken. She will finish her semester at the public high school, dropping one elective which she can later on make up for, and then start a new semester either from home with on line classes or with dual enrollment at the local college.
The result: She is visibly relieved and happier.
She told me the reactions of some of her class mates in the IB program , who are also suffering under tremendous stress, and they are all jealous! "I wish my mom would let me."
I smiled and said :"They need a life coach for a mom." All kidding aside. I mentioned to her that I know full well, that she will accomplish great things. Because, when you feel good and you are motivated and you feel validated and respected, your motivation is at a much higher level then when you are forced to do something . And when you are intrinsically motivated, you feel like you can change the world. I know she will. In her own way. Without me telling her how. I am so excited for her.
And this my friends is how we empower our children.
I just wanted you to see a glimpse of conscious parenting applied to the teen age years. I know some of you have younger children and wonder about what's headed your way. Teens are awesome. You CAN enjoy them. I am.
Of course these principles apply to all relationships.
If you have any questions, send me a note. I'd love to help you transform your relationship.
You are loved. Deeply loved. Loved beyond measure.
Until next time,