Tuesday thoughts And A New Chance

Isabelle
5 days ago
3 min read

Hi Friends,

This week I want to piggy back on last week’s Mother’s Day blog. Every one feels different about how to mother the best way. Even with the same parenting style you can end up with very different results.

I realized that kids can’t be programmed, they are meant to be themselves and we are supposed to help them unfold, not fit them in a box. I tried that. And I made a lot of mistakes. I did a lot right, but I missed a lot, too.

There really isn’t a big moment, or crash. No warning sign. Just a quiet realization somewhere in the middle of an ordinary day… that you’ve been living your life on autopilot.

Doing what needs to be done. Showing up for everyone else. Keeping things running.

And now, with my children grown, I can see parts of it more clearly: choices I made instinctively, years that moved too fast, and yes… even a few regrets about how I showed up in motherhood.

Not because I didn’t love them. I loved them fiercely. But somewhere along the way, I stopped checking in with myself, how I really wanted to show up as a mom, and I needed to check in with my children more, on a deeper level.

Looking back now, I realize how much of my life was spent on autopilot. I was moving from one responsibility to the next, solving problems, organizing schedules, working, cooking, helping, worrying, planning. I became so focused on keeping life running that I missed some things that were actually important.

Moments where I could have slowed down more. Conversations where I could have listened better. Times when my children may have needed my presence more than my solutions. Moments with myself that I completely ignored because there simply didn’t seem to be time.

Autopilot can look very responsible from the outside. You are functioning, producing, helping, surviving. People may even compliment you on how much you handle.

But internally, you slowly disconnect from yourself and your loved one’s deeper emotions.

I think this happens to so many women, especially mothers. We become experts at anticipating everyone else’s needs. We know who likes what for dinner, who is struggling silently, who needs encouragement, who forgot something important. We become the emotional center of the family, often without even realizing how much energy that requires.

And for a long time, it feels meaningful. Necessary. Sometimes even beautiful.

One day the house gets quieter. The schedules change. The children grow into adults with lives of their own. And suddenly there is space again. Space that once felt impossible to imagine.

And in that space, questions begin to rise.

Did I do things right? What did I miss? What do I want my life to look like now? How do I build deeper connections with my grown children now?

Those questions can feel uncomfortable at first. But I don’t think it’s selfish to wake up from autopilot and start paying attention to your own life again.

I think it’s honest.

There were moments in my motherhood that I would handle differently now. Times I was overwhelmed. Times I reacted instead of listened. Times I carried stress that spilled into the atmosphere of our home. And there were also moments of deep joy, laughter until tears came, traditions, road trips, and ordinary days that became the foundation of a family.

Both things can be true at the same time.

We can look back with gratitude and still acknowledge regret. We can deeply love our children and still admit we lost ourselves somewhere along the way.

That realization does not make us failures. It makes us human. The beautiful part is that life does not end when we become aware of this. In many ways, awareness is where life begins again.

Midlife has a way of pulling us back toward ourselves. And with that we can show up more authentically as a mom to our adult children. We grow toward becoming more honest, more grounded, more aware.

Maybe this season is not about reinventing everything dramatically. Maybe it’s simply about learning to listen to yourself again. Slowing down enough to notice what brings you peace. Allowing yourself to dream without immediately dismissing those dreams as unrealistic or unnecessary. For me one dream is to have mended, healed, deeper relationships with my children.

So, here is to more honesty, more awareness, more growth. This weeks' affirmation:

I allow myself to keep growing with wisdom, grace, and honesty.

PS: Message me for a free consult to start moving toward a more confident you.

You are loved. Deeply loved. Loved beyond measure.