Hi Friends,
Were you able to use the journal prompts? Keep them handy for the times you need them. As part of my own personal development, I often sign up for workshops and courses. You can get a lot of them for free where experts share their expertise on a certain topic. Two of those courses had one thing in common last week, and it was to name our "judge" or "inner critic". One teacher called it the judge and one called it the barking dog. Therefore; today's picture of a barking dog. You know, your friend's or neighbor's dog who is just always barking at you or anyone for no particular reason and he won't shut up? That one. Picture that dog in your mind. What breed is it? How annoying is it? Now, picture this dog and give him or her a mean name. The name that came to me was "Schnauze". A German word that I wouldn't use on people because it kind of translates to "shut up". But, it is a perfect fit for this inner critic; the voice that doesn't shut up and is a constant background noise of critiques and judgements. You know that voice, don't you? We all have one. It really helps to visualize it as a separate entity. As something that is outside of you and NOT YOU. Give it his or her own name. Here's why... Next time you notice that inner judge, that barking dog, you pause. That's right. You want to slow it down so you can pause and CHANGE this pattern. It usually leaves you feeling like "you should" be doing something or be somebody you are not. It is a skill to learn to even notice it when it happens. My clients learn this skill as part of the work they do. So once you notice it, and you pause, then you proceed as follows: My judge/barking dog (fill in name you gave it), tells me : " Here you go again. I knew you'd mess this up." " You are so lazy." " You are too fat." " You will never get this job. Others are better than you." " I can't believe you fell for this. You are so stupid." " You are not spiritual enough. Gotta pray more, read more, meditate more..." " You suck as a friend. That's why she didn't invite you." " There something wrong with you." " No one appreciates how hard you work." " You can't handle this stress." " He /she is too good for you."
" I am alone. I have to do this alone."
...and many more.
I would love to hear what your inner judge tells you.
So, back to the exercise. Once you hear it you say to yourself, "Schnauze (fill in the name you gave your judge) tells me that I'm....that I should....that I always..."
Feel the difference?
You have now taken it out of you as a separate entity and it is this barking dog who tells you these things.
Then you can visualize it and look in from the outside and observe this barking dog, and ask yourself my question:
"Is this really true?" Practice this and let me know how it goes. It will never go away, but we can turn down the volume. The barking will become softer and not as annoying. You get what I'm saying?
"The judge is the universal Saboteur, the one we all have; a predisposition to exaggerating the negative and assuming the worst is actually good for survival."
Shirzad Chamine
For more information on positive intelligence, check out Shirzad Chamine, author, coach, speaker and developer of the PQ app. And contact me for personal coaching, to finally lower the volume of your inner critic. It takes work, and I'd love to guide and support you with this work.
PS: Message me for a free consult to start moving toward a more confident you..
You are loved. Deeply loved. Loved beyond measure.
Until next time, Isabelle
Call or write for a free life coaching consultation
#732-331-2246
Isabellestephensoncoach@gmail.com