Hi Friends, Did you ask yourself some of the hard questions from last week? You might not know this, but I make these pictures with an affirmation or new thought for my clients. This one came up a few times this past week. Women, including myself, who have been taught all their lives to give and serve and do and please. It is incredibly hard for us to say NO and to speak up for ourselves. This is also self-care. You might first think of getting a massage or getting your nails done when you hear the word self-care. That is part of it. But way harder and much more necessary is the art of learning to say "NO." And the art of speaking up for ourselves when we are talked down to, when we are belittled and bullied. One client has to learn to speak up in kindness and respect to her boss who freely criticized her private life choices. And she AUTOMATICALLY felt belittled and guilty and unstable. Now if you have followed me for a while, you know that no one can make us feel anything. It is the story we tell ourselves that makes us feel guilty and bad and so on... Remember, these stories we tell ourselves are automatic. They come up instantly. They are like uninvited, rude guests who tell us the worst things. Except that we let these guests in again and again and again. Another client felt guilted into hosting a holiday party by a good friend! Taking care of ourselves means saying: No, when we are overscheduled. No, when we are being used. No, when someone is rude. No, when someone is intruding into your private affairs. NO! It means starting with awareness. Observing yourself. And then literally practicing a new response. Practice makes perfect, right? We need to carefully observe our automated responses...the yesses, when we feel like saying no. The quiet retreating instead of speaking up. It's the women in my generation and those who are older that I'm speaking to. The younger folks have no problem speaking up. I respect that about them. It's healthy. It's an important part of self-care. So message me when you need to learn to reprogram yourself, cause that's what it takes. A whole new program! Once it's downloaded, you can grab these new responses when needed. Because if we don't change the programming, we will respond the way we always have. And the cycle continues. Feel free to download the picture if that's possible. If not, message me and I will send it to you. Make it your screen saver. Remind yourself daily. My client added the word committed to the affirmation: I am taking care of myself. I like that.
I am committed to taking care of myself. Isabelle
How is that for a new year's resolution?
PS: Message me for a free consult to start moving toward a more confident you.
You are loved. Deeply loved. Loved beyond measure.
Until next time, Isabelle
Call or write for a free life coaching consultation
#732-331-2246
Isabellestephensoncoach@gmail.com
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